tUnE iN To tHE rEigN oF siLeNcE~

2004-03-11T04:29:00.000-08:00

I have moved. my new blog's at http://solitaryrain.pitas.com

2003-08-10T06:54:00.000-07:00

I shall close down this blog... Can't be bothered to blog anymore. I am just too damn sick and tired of the world.

2003-08-06T05:49:00.000-07:00

hmm. thanks char for the mayan/egyptian-ancient-scroll-like design thingie. yay. It looks so nice!! I totally love my file now. Its got a [pirats of the carribean] pic on one side and the design by char on the other side. =)
yups. still in 3rds. er.. cartoon express was haha.... i better not say anything. as for jurassic park and republica, i forgot where to repeat from so... lahdidah... its pretty obvious how it turned out lah. and lord of the dance... the timing was scary... and the quavers that iballs played so fast was scary. then in the end liane had to point out where we were and she had to sort of hum the rythm for us... =(
i hate school work, homework, and basically school in general. -ho hum-

2003-07-31T06:34:00.000-07:00

yay. was in a good mood today. designed that. The lettering was fun to do. and i still think emm pronounces "js" funnily. lol. yeps. and i stil think that piece of vanguard is jinxed. watever. oh yah. just finished reading "to kill a mockingbird". [ahh.. i know i'm behind schedule]. it was sad. made me think about the sad reality of humans and society. and racism and prejudism. Why cant the world ever be free of such things? I wonder...
yep anyway. just realised that the sectionbatch blog is dead. and decomposed. It has been left untouched for more than a month now. -looks sheepishly-. I'm guilty for not writing in it too lah. heh. paiseh. what shud we do about it?

2003-07-30T06:40:00.000-07:00

yeah. thanks for the advice. it was a little harsh but it helped alot.
wonder what happened about her though.. i just didnt know what to do. Sometimes the worst feeling you can get, is when you realise you are not that successful as you thought you were.

2003-07-29T18:54:00.000-07:00

ok. im pissed AGAIN. my mood has been fluctuating unpredictably for the last few days. And it doesnt help that i got into big trouble yesterday. Cuz i totally forgot there was this dinner for my grand-auntie's birthday that started at 5.30. So my sis was kind of pissed at 6 pm and she came in to get me. then we reached like at 6.30? So i was 1 whole hour late. Whatever. And my mum scolded me the whole way home.
And now my bloody science prac is missing. Apparently it has vaporised. whatever man. I shall just not think about it.
Suddenly have the urge to listen to "keep on moving" by five. Its such a frisky song... Every time i listen to it, my mood lightens up. =) yeah. here are the lyrics...

KEEP ON MOVING
By: Five
I woke up today with this feeling.
Better things are coming my way.
I know the sunshine has a meaning,
And nothing left can get in my way

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying
All the bees and birds are flying
Ahhhh...

Never let go, gotta hold on and
Nonstop 'til the break of dawn and
Keep on moving, don't stop rocking
Ahhhh...

Get on up
When you're down, baby,
Take a good look around.
I know it's not much,
But it's okay.
Keep on movin' on anyway

Feels like I have should be screaming,
Trying get through to my friends.
sometimes it feels that life has no meaning,
But all things will be alright in the end.

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying
All the bees and birds are flying
Ahhhh...

Never let go, gotta hold on and
Non-stop 'til the break of dawn and
Keep on moving, don't stop rocking
Ahhhh...

Get on up
When you're down, baby,
Take a good look around.
I know it's not much,
But it's okay.
Keep on movin' on anyway

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying
All the bees and birds are flying
Ahhhh...
Never let go, gotta hold on and
Nonstop 'til the break of dawn and
Keep on moving, don't stop rocking
Ahhhh...

Get on up
When you're down, baby,
Take a good look around.
I know it's not much,
But it's okay.
Keep on movin' on anyway

Get on up
When you're down, baby,
Take a good look around.
I know it's not much,
But it's okay.
Keep on movin' on anyway
Get on up

Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
I know it's not much
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'
Get on up
Keep on movin'
Keep on movin'

2003-07-29T06:31:00.000-07:00

You're a Disney Elite!
You're a true Disney fan.
You know all the details and you've
spent a lot of time obsessing over the
hidden mickeys in Walt's earliest films.
Yay for you. You're smart and you know
what's good in the world of Disney. Some
might call you obsessive, but we know better.
There are plenty of people like you in the world.
You just have to search them out.

What type of Disney Fan are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

The bright and beautiful Belle! You have dreams
about storybook romances and exhillarating
sword fights. You have a keen intelligence and
a gentle disposition. You love to read and you
love solving puzzles. (Beauty and the Beast,
1993)

Which COOL Disney Princess are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Your prince is the Beast, but behind his outter
shell, and tough attitude, he's actually very
kind and caring. He may be intimidating, but
once you get to know him, he's a great guy..and
very handsome, too.

Which Disney prince are you meant to be with?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're LIZZIE *from Lizzie McGuire*

What Disney Channel Star are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're Miranda! You have attitude and are loyal to
your friends!

*?Which Lizzie Mcguire Character Are You?*
brought to you by Quizilla

What Finding Nemo Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-07-29T06:26:00.000-07:00

Edelweiss, edelweiss
Ev'ry morning you greet me
Small and white
Clean and bright
You look happy to meet me

Blossom of snow
May you bloom and grow
Bloom and grow forever
Edelweiss, edelweiss
Bless my homeland forever

Small and white
Clean and bright
You look happy to meet me

Blossom of snow
May you bloom and grow
Bloom and grow forever
Edelweiss, edelweiss
Bless my homeland forever

2003-07-26T20:41:00.000-07:00

omg. we got GOLD.
funny. time seems to fly... just one week ago, i was just wondering how it would be on stage and whether i would freak out. and then, here we are... haha. i was dying with anticipation and when they finally announced it I was so happy i felt like screaming out forever.

2003-07-24T08:48:00.000-07:00

For once, I enjoyed a long day. Science prac was so so fun!!=) and geog was so slack. cuz that grp did their presentation and took up the whole lesson. and PE was fun too. tried on some equipment. I cant wait before we rock climb with the equipment. without it, I always dont dare to climb higher. Worse still, I always dont know how to climb down. Its scaree when you look down and think like "oh man, what if i fall and die?"
oh yah. chinese was a really fun lesson today. joined char,yinqi,smint and mushroom's grp cuz sarah(their group member) wasnt there. We had a fun time disrupting the lesson and bursting out in torrents of laughter. haha. I wanna join their grp permanently. it was so fun. oh and i conclude loy is blind. She didnt notice a rubber spider that we made so obvious to her. We even drew arrows to catch her attention. lol.

2003-07-23T05:54:00.000-07:00

Just heard the news about that British biologist Dr Kelly(spelling?). i think that story was horrifying. Its as though all hope has been lost. I mean, whats wrong with standing up? whats wrong with telling the truth? to hell with pre-emptive wars. In the process, more lives are lost and security, instead of being gained, is lost. hah.

2003-07-22T05:51:00.000-07:00

whatever. so now you're pissed with me. You've always been, havent you?
Yengling helped me solve my reed problem. [thanx]. we tried out alot of diffrent reeds and surprisingly, my dead chipped one sounded the best. haha. wonder why. so in the end i took sophia's reed. [oops. sorry].
haiz.... jap test tml. i want to steal my sister's brain. shes so zai......... cant i just borrow her brain for tml? just for the test? hmph.
yup. on top of all that.. i'm now being addresed as JING ting. Gold. superstition. geddit? haha.

2003-07-21T09:03:00.000-07:00

it hurts. it hurts real bad. I wonder...when did things start to fall apart? I know I did many things to let you down... But please dont let everything just fade away...
Why does this friendship have to end? Werent you the one who said we would be friends forever? Werent you the one who told me so? Please.. Dont let everything just come to a crash. I guess this wont mean anything. You probably dont even read my blog anymore. You dont care like you used to. I wish you would.. Now adays you just seem so distant. I wanna reach out to you... But you've flown off and left me behind... Maybe I deserved it. *shrugs*.

2003-07-21T08:00:00.000-07:00

heh. racial harmony celebrations were quite boring... but at least it was slack and there wasnt any lessons. =) yep yep. the sarong thingie was.. abit wierd though. looked bad on me. i dont think i tied it correctly in the first place. and it was like trailing around on the floor.. so i just removed it in the end. hmms.
hmms. jasmine's futile attempts to french braid my hair was funny. hai. i think my hair is like this thick clump... why couldnt it be thinner? oh well.... yah. fervently studying for jap test now. Sometimes I wonder why nothing seems to go right regarding 3rd lang. Everyone keeps asking why i wun pon it or drop it. I myself cant really answer that. I used to love studying japanese alot. It was my favourite subject. Then this year it was like, everyonw kept saying stuff like why not give up 3rd lang and invest ur commitment and time to somthing else. Or stuff about why i should pon it. Damn it. Cant you see that I am already having hell? Its not like I only work hard for 3rd lang. Its so damn unfair. I dont put you down in your other activities. I dont pin point you. Just buzz off and leave me alone wont you. Cant you understand? I am TRYING to take charge of all my commitments with optimism but everyone just doesnt seem to approve of my learning 3rd lang. whatever. I dont give a damn. I stopped caring a long time ago. Whats the point in shouting out?No one's listening anyway. Fine. I shall not go on complaining. like i said.. who gives a damn.
yah enough of unhappy stuff. watched "sound of music" with my mum. I thought it was pretty sweet and the song edelweiss is currently stuck in my head Its such a nice song... haha. and Julie Andrews is really pretty. and sweet. its funny to imagine that she is the same actress as that grandmother in "princess diaries". It was so wierd. But her acting skills are cool. heh. shall log off now.

2003-07-16T07:27:00.000-07:00

internet reversi is so irritating. the chat function, i mean... You cant type what you truly want to say. Because of the limited choice of words. Today, this irritating French had the nerve to say "It was luck" when i captured the corner. I was tempted to say, "Go and die" or "You are the most irritating freakish person I have ever met". Unfortunately, there was that darn limited choice of words so I had no choice but to lamely put a ":-("... *bares teeths and shakes fist*. And on the other hand, there can be totally friendly and sweet opponents. Such as an English whom I played with after. He kept saying Good luck and Nice moves encouragingly. I really wanted to type stuff like "thanks a million" or "that was nice of you". But all they had was a lousy "thank you" that sounds totally insincere. And of course, theres no way you could ever contact that person. Which is sad. And theres the time I wanted to congratulate someone for capturing the corner and I couldnt. So I just said lamely "good job" or "nice try". GAH.

2003-07-15T06:00:00.000-07:00

yay. finally got the new layout up. Thanks to Char who designed it and Emm thor who helped me to get it to work. heh.
yups. anyway, got 21.5/30 for physics test. Yay. so happy.i passed kay? =) =) =). haha. over the moon. yar, u get the point. and today physics lesson was quite fun. emm tan was really funny. and that stupid guy who played internet reversi with her... claimed to b a beginner but play until so pro... the jap one. and than the english one was so funny. first he said that he had to go and "bye". then suddenly he said "hello". so we thought he prob was lying about being English. cuz he didnt seem to understand what he was typing...haha. and the light bulb thingie.. our obsevation for the short circuit was that the set up blew up and there was an explosion. muahaha. then julie quah was like, what explosion? haish. she just had to read my w/s....
yup. and charissa and i agree that HOD of gep seems like Umbridge. Ahem ahem.. She even dresses pink like her. ewww. sigh. she just HAD to give us a pep talk. i thought that issue was sort of cleared up a long time ago? shrugs. not like i care anyway. -a person can only care so much before she gives up- whatever. and the whole time she made that speech, i was like thinking, whatever, who cares, i wanna sleep... but how she knows our names just freaks me out. I DONT want her to know me. hmph.

2003-07-14T06:58:00.000-07:00

hello.. err hope i dint screw up your template or anything. hope you're satisfied=) btw hm you might consider using a blank to get rid of that irritating ad. it really ruins the whole template which is otherwise perfect=) yup.

2003-07-14T06:17:00.000-07:00

Ok. Shall try to change my template. Thanks Char. hope i dun ruin it..

2003-07-08T19:06:00.000-07:00

got our yearbooks. =)i looked reallie different last year though.... brings back lots of memories. i miss 114'02. we were a really noisy, happy, and at the same time, united class. But life's like that. you have to let go when you should. its just like remembering her. when she left, i was so sure i would be feeling so lost... without a best friend and all that. But it turns out that she probably didnt care as much as i did about her. knowing that hurts. it really does. But then.. at least i was able to find someone else who was really special. [u know who you are]. yups. thanks =)... haha. watched "farewell to my concubine". Leslie Cheung starred in it. It was a really nice show, apart from him acting as a "gay", in a sense. But even then, he portrayed the character really well. I think he's a really good actor. And i thought he was really pitiful in that show. sigh. Like Bill Gates [i think] once said, Life sucks. get used to it.

2003-07-08T05:55:00.000-07:00

sigh. havent updated in like, a million years. well, i think my dad has enuff knowledge to go be a history/geog teacher. everything he tells me, jwoon ends up saying it sometime or other. shant elaborate. yups. and my sister's history lecturer's latest gossip is that he even went to find out what brand of clothes clay likes most and is currently wearing them everyday. -_-"... loser. whatever. fell sho sleepy.......... i want more judith mcnaught books!!! =( im broke. i want more money so i can buy. whatever.

2003-07-01T19:43:00.000-07:00

haha. this comp studies teacher is so slack. i dont even know what programme he is trying to teach us. yep. for the whole lesson, i was surfing the net, reading blogs etc and he doesnt know. and now, he has given us extra free time in the lesson to do whatever we want.. so loser man. but at least hes not like the pregnant teacher.... really fierce. yup yup yup. i still cannot believe Stalin wanted to be a priest. LOL. and hitler wanted to be an artist. well, at least artist is still believable... but PRIEST?! oh man. Stalin sure is wierd. and in the end, he becomes such a powerful dictator. *shudders*. and imagine swooning at hitler's feet just because his eyes meet yours. ewww. those girls have got to be despo beyond belief. how can a boring, cruel person be CHARMING and handsome? ok. whatever. maybe its just a 1930 thing. moustaches were in fashion or something. yuck. heh. Finding Nemo is so cute!! And Dory is really funny. "just keep swimming". haha.

2003-06-27T08:28:00.000-07:00

yeps. i hereby conclude that science teachers love to climb onto tables when teaching. or is it just ivan soh and julie quah?*rolls eyes and sighs*... yah. apparently, no one else is going to Sab's house for geog project tml... and i havent done a damn thing. what the hell man. ok nvm. i shall do a last minute research now. and hope fervently that I will NOT be termed a slacker by Sabs tomoro. [i admit it. i AM one].
i wanna change my template.. but i dun noe how to convert it from the pitas thingie to a blogger one. help me.... please??? *despereately begs*. aniwae, thanx char for helping me design it. love the pic. he looks real good in it.
yeps. "Whitney my love" is so nice. haha... judith mcnaught books rawk! my favourite is still "once and always" though... it was really sweet. and the fact that all the characters are somehow linked, and eventually meet in "until you"... man, that is positively cool. Thanks eyeballs for starting the craze! you rawk! her books are so sweet... shall go off now... *dreams of "once and always" *

2003-06-24T07:05:00.000-07:00

sobs. fever from saturday to monday. sobs.sirius black died. why???... and i was just thinking how sweet a god-father he was... and lousy umbridge. kicks her.
Ron is on the quidditch team though, as well as being a prefect. small yay. dun think it really makes up for sirius's death.

2003-06-08T21:32:00.000-07:00

http://www.mizjenna.com/~mizgraphics/jenna/fractal_fun/
any volunteers to help me get the template above to work for my blog? *shrugs*. dares not try it myself or i might ruin my entire blog.

2003-06-08T21:14:00.000-07:00

blah. Blogger is NOT updating my entries... anyway, my dad just got me a cat. yay. =D so happy. its white with a grey tail, and a grey spot on its head. so cute!!

2003-06-04T06:16:00.000-07:00

You get pyro..you lucky lucky person...I wish I
could have pyro..no actually I wish i could
marry him and..uhm..oh..yea...hehe

Which X-2 character should you be with?
brought to you by Quizilla
YAY PYRO ROX THIS WORLD

Your Heart is Blue

What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

Raffles Institution

which secondary school (singapore) should you be in?
brought to you by Quizilla
ARGH. I am NOT a male.

2003-06-02T06:03:00.000-07:00

OMG. i finished reading it in 1 day!! "Gone With the Wind" is a horribly sad book. and to think i thought it would be a nice read, with the romance and stuff. how was i to know that the ending was so horrible? And that stupid girl... how could she have been so foolish? The man who truly loved her was right in front of her.. and he was so nice. and she ruined everything because she refused to let go of her first love, who was an idiotic, wishy-washy mimby-pamby character. *sobs*. why do people never treasure what they have until they lose it? very depressing. warning to all: do NOT read this book unless u are in an angsty mood..
yups. i guess ivan soh decuded to be nice today. he somehow managed to increase my fail-grade to a passing grade that only missed the borderline by 1.5 marks. thats a big improvement for my low standards. yeps. thats quite a good news to me. =)

2003-06-01T00:14:00.000-07:00

This is so unfair. why is it always me who gets the blame?
its not my fault that everyone told me last minute! and now she probably thinks that it was MY fault and that I was the one being last-minute. -glares-.
and my sis has just gone from unreasonable to ... whatever. theres no term for it. i mean, i was telling her about this baby in a cinema and how someone yelled at it for screaming throughout the show. then, she just started screaming at me and saying i was unfeelingand stuff.just because i said that the baby's parents were irresponsible for bringing it to the cinema. well, FINE. the next time u watch a show, i am going to invite ALL the babies i noe and send them screaming throughout the whole movie. and dont come complaining to me.
and cass, its NOT what you think.

2003-05-29T05:12:00.000-07:00

things i learnt today:
1. never ever use an un-seasoned reed for sectionals or band pracs. it makes us sound super airy.
2. never trust webmasters even when they give you their word that they are certified and accurate.
3. Gandalf is sooooo not an elven king. He's an istari. [haha]
4. Boromir and Glorfindel are NOT the same people. [har har har]
5. Volleyball is a dangerous game... esp when you are setting the ball.
6. If you break a nail, don't complain. it only makes you sound like a bimbo.
7. Never trust Mrs Quah when she tells you that your file is due. [i spent the whole night arranging it neatly and she tells me its not due tue next thursday]
8. Younger brothers just cannot sit still for more than 10 minutes. [don't ask me why]

haha... today was okay. and did i mention that i completed the air-conditioned nation individual thingie all by myself yesterday night? feels so accomplished. yay. oh yah. sorry emm.. my dad was in a bad mood and he sort of said that he would b late for work and stuff...

2003-05-27T05:08:00.000-07:00

I just knew it. she wouldnt understand. cant she just give me some space? How can she think that i dont feel guilty? Of course i do. and i think that at this rate, I will suffer from a nervous break down. I bottle up everything inside because i dont want anyone to know how i feel. its not nice. but apparently, that doesnt work. And why cant she believe me? When i say i do, i really do.
If this is how the world is, I'd rather i never existed at all.

2003-05-26T06:40:00.000-07:00

"I'm With You"

I'm standing on a bridge
I'm waiting in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
There's nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I'm listening but there's no sound

Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you

I'm looking for a place
Searching for a face
Is anybody here I know
'Cause nothing's going right
And everythigns a mess
And no one likes to be alone

Isn't anyone trying to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you

Oh why is everything so confusing
Maybe I'm just out of my mind
Yea yea yea

It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Won't you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you

Take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you

Take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you
I'm with you...

2003-05-26T05:15:00.000-07:00

broke down and cried in the corr today. i have no idea how. I thought i was controlling my worries rather well... but apparently, nope... somehow, i just couldnt stand it anymore. ok. this is embarassing.... and then again, its terrible. it feels like the end of the world.

2003-05-25T21:47:00.000-07:00

sigh.... my poor blog just got defaced by certain ppl. *glares*. and the oguri shun thing... abit obvious sia. [nonono not obvious at all man.] nvm. it wasnt me anyway... hmph. oh yar..... just got CA marks back. dunno how lar. i bet i under review alredi larh........ sigh sigh.... i have a sudden urge to go walk in the rain, but apparently, the only traces of any rain, has just ended. *sobs*....... haish.... shall go home and wallow in self-pity.... dunno how alredi... and i just found out that that stupid song i composed in p3 sounds reallie like a funeral march loh....... hmm... by the way, pyro is on my desk top now... *squeaks and squeals*...... haha... shall end off as there is this long q of ppl who want to use the comp... esp grace, who is hammering the screen top and impatiently asking me to hurry up. HUGE UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR MAN...... argh.... the glass screen is going to crakc... have to end off b4 she reallie causes REAL damage.....

2003-05-25T21:41:00.000-07:00

hi everyone this is grace. mable quek is beside me. please don't disturb us. hehehehehehehe. emmaline wants to interrupt but we need our privacy please. don't intrude into adult matters.

emm here. hahaha what grace typed sounds so sick. hahahha. dont gao san gao si. so jian bu de guang. wahahhaha. dance just ended. think im gonna fail. YAY. so fun.

OGURI SHUN ROX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CLAY ROX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! V6 ROX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XX ROX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -SZE MIN. [PS. oguri SHUN rawksssssssssssssssssssss]

*steps in, stares at the above madness and runs out shrieking* (charissa)

2003-05-20T05:41:00.000-07:00

yay... my b'dae was over so quickly, kinda hard to believe... haha =)... i think my parent's prezzies rawk man... i got a new computer and its my personal one too =)... as well as a new OP wallet and i guess the Xmen2 book can be considered one of my presents...[i think]. yar... thanks hamsie and constance for the stuffed toys and post card.the cat was so kewt!! ^^~
and thanks to my dearest section batch mates for that flower... its soo soo kewt... =P
yps. in a chao(1) good mood today... tho i had better study for chinese.. its on thursday. yar. bb

2003-05-14T19:38:00.000-07:00

haha.. just bought the First magazine.. i think the only reason i bought it was for the post cards.. lol. anw, i just found out that pyro has the same birthday as me. not that im overjoyed or anything. after all, im not really a fan of his.. i think ice man is more shuai. yeps... happy vesak day to one and all.

2003-05-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

Just 2 things i learned today.. Firstly, i just realised that looks can truly be deceiving. I never used to greet the security guard at the bus stop gate before, because i thought he looked grouchy. Today i decided to be crappy and greeted him and to my shock (a little horror), he suddenly smiled. He looked totally different from his grouchy self... And it was then I resolved that in future, i will never ignore a person just because of his/her looks.
Secondly, i feel that some songs just never grow old. Its true.. When you listen to them, its as though they have existed beyond time, and you feel as though they could have been from the future or the past, and there's just no possible way of telling. Was listening to "your song" by Elton John today.. and i guess, it is a good example.. Somehow, the way everything harmonises is just prefect and thre's no way of telling its actually a rather old song. If only memories could be like that and last for eternity... but even the most precious memories will eventually fade away. just like pages of a book turning yellow. If only they could forever remain evergreen in our minds, living on as grand legends... But "forever" never lasts, does it? You often get friends telling you that you will remain 'friends forever', but after a while, time passes and you either lose contact or you just slip out of each other's minds. And when your memory suddenly gets triggered off, all the sad and happy times suddenly come rushing back to you and there's this great pang of guilt and longing for your friend; and this sadness in your heart, longing to know how he/she is doing now; and more sadness because you realise that you may never see him/her in your life again, just living on the same earth, but never once crossing the same path again.
But that's just life, isn't it? Life is never meant to be perfect, i guess. And even if it was, most people would still find a reason to be unhappy with the way things were. Its as though there were no way of satisfying them... And sadly, i think i fall into that category.. I think I happen to be the type of people who does nothing but complains about everything around myself... As i said before, I need an attitude adjusment.

Your song
It's a little bit funny this feeling inside
I'm not one of those who can easily hide
I don't have much money but boy if I did
I'd buy a big house where we both could live

If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a travelling show
I know it's not much but it's the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one's for you

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world

I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well a few of the verses well they've got me quite cross
But the sun's been quite kind while I wrote this song
It's for people like you that keep it turned on

So excuse me forgetting but these things I do
You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

2003-05-13T19:28:00.000-07:00

am going to change to pitas soon. i will only change after charissa helps me with them template...
i still cannot believe that some bloody idiot hacked into my neopets account. what the shit man. i had 20 000. and now i am left with like what, 31? Forget it. just forget it. Maybe i was wrong to think that most people would at least have enough honesty to leave my account alone. And what about my wallet? it was the exact same thing as well. i thought that it would be safe to just leave my bag alone for a moment and what happens? some filthy little theiving idiot comes along and thinks its cool to steal from my bag. I mean, what is it in your sick disgusting mind that makes you think it can be nice to steal?! OK. i shall just forget about it. this just totally sucks.
nvm. shall not think unhappy thoughts. played Elisabeth yesterday... i think that being in 1st is quite... nice yet freaky at the same time... nice because xinyi is just next to you and she gives very patient advice. Freaky in the way the notes are so so high and the running notes can kill. Freaky in the way that you feel scared to play out fearing that you will play wrongly and dissapoint xinyi / huichong, who happen to be sitting very near you. Freaky because I am the only one there; ok that isnt a valid reason, but it just makes me feel more nervous. sigh... i think that elisabeth and queen's park are so nice..... fell in love with the melodies... =)

2003-05-08T06:04:00.000-07:00

haha... just got my comp to work! amazing isnt it =)... haha... had a fun time chatting with cheryl and ying han today during lit instead of paying attention. [dun start lecturing me]. anyway... i have finally found another fellow Ron/Hermione pairing supporter. *yay*... and then ying han gave cheryl's pencil case a "new look" by cutting off the cover thingie. haha.
okay.. just had 5 items today... did okay other than sbj, which totally sucked. glah. i shall not have any comments. and then my dad didnt turn on his handphone so he didnt pick me up. so i took bus home... and to prevent myself from falling asleep and missing the stop, i watched this reallie stupid show on that tv thingie and after getting bored, i wrote in the sbj... haha. reallie sleepy today. i WANT TO SLEEP. screams.

2003-05-06T19:09:00.000-07:00

this is comp studies. finally, i get internet supply =)... my comp has totally died and i have no way of using it at all, much less the internet. haish. actually, my mind is blank at the moment. i am having orals later. English. i bet i will get tongue tied in front of the invigilator or tester, whatever she/he is. esp during conversation... i suck at it. totally. hmms. bought my mum a mother's day gift alredi. its a cd. later on, im going to west mall bread talk to order that mother's day cake thingie... i am sooo broke. wonder how i am ever going to survive through the rest of this week. hah. anw, jap test yesterday. i studied the kanji section with gt at macs reallie well so it wasnt a problem. but the grammar... erm. no comments lah. and the compo was totally crappy.... it was about "my hobby". amw, emm's compo best larh... it was quite funny. =) haha... i feel so sleepy. and i want to complain about something i cannot disclose... the geog test... argh... i shall just say that i spent 2 hours studying something that didnt come out. hah. was so so pissed. and i WANT to watch x2. ice man looks so cool.............. and magneto.. i was so pissed. i argued with at least 5 ppl that he looked like Gandalf and they told me i was blind and that they did not resemble each other at all. and in the end, i found a list of the cast and guess what? magneto and Gandalf is played by the same actor. ARGH. oh yar... need to add mingyan. haha.. shall continue slacking. haha... i want to be at home sleeping. yawns. life is getting to busy, stressful and boring. haha.. my sis's fren gave her a post card featuring Ron weasley. and my sis, being nice, gave it to me =). yay. it should be able to keep me happy for the time being. i guess... haha. shall end off.

2003-05-05T05:46:00.000-07:00

hmmms... had my hair cut yesterday. not much of a diff, just shorter and neater i guess. wonders fervently. should i skip school? i want to. just dunno if i shud go. maths post test some more. argh... and jillian woon lost my worksheet or doesnt noe where it is, for that matter. harh. am pissed. my comp is still conked out. carn use msn at all. bloody hell. what am i supposed to do now? and i cannot print anything out. cuz of lack of ink. how? the microwaves thingie. im so dead. ahhhhh.

2003-05-02T22:27:00.000-07:00

unbelievable things that have just happened:
- i actually passed 2.4
- hui juen was complaining that she wasnt in the mood for running but came in with the fastest timing anw.
- szemin's brainwashing [probably] worked. (-_-")
- i ran one whole length talking to thin air without realising that emmaline was not beside me.
- i ran 2 rounds searching for emmaline, thinking she was ahead of me far far away.
- i went for sectionals in a pair of disgustingly sopping wet and muddy shoes and took them off halfway thru.
- i actually find merchant of venice bearable.

yeps... haha. today is just wierd. haha... just realised how bad my sight reading skills are. got lost through-out E... i think starting in the middle of nowhere of the piece made things worse. As for QPM, i think the only reason why i managed to catch up and not get so lost was because hui chong was next to me so i could hear which part she was playing...
i feel dead. and drained. and its just a few hours after the run and my muscles are already starting to ache. [owww]
lesson of the day: i must remember in future, never ever to trust mushrooms when they tell me that they are unable to run, not in the mood for running or any other similar excuse.

2003-04-30T21:48:00.000-07:00

well...changed my template.. [thanks emm]... haha.. its nice, but somehow, it isnt really me. dunno. maybe i will change it again soon... lets wait and see how i live with it. anw, the links thingie is so cool. haha.

2003-04-29T19:00:00.000-07:00

hmmm... just now something really bad happened to the cat image.. thank goodness it just re-appeared. *yay*... lets see... i want to change my blog template.. just that i have not found a good suitable one right. tmr is a public holiday... ok nvm, im stating the obvious.
anw,... felt reallie bad when i couldnt help you when you felt depressed yesterday... i guess i was just going on about my own problems... sorry... wonder if u even read my blog in the first place. =P...
yeps. signing off now.

2003-04-29T06:26:00.000-07:00

haha.. long time no blog.. am totally freezing now. want to turn off air con but bro doesnt want... haha... thanx a million to si en for helping me print out the stuff... reallie appreciated.. thanx to hamsie and joey for the hugs today... haha... i think my irs teacher hates our group. we never do anything constructive at all. dun reallie care larh. hecks. shall end off. this is a reallie short entry but nvm.

2003-04-21T05:46:00.000-07:00

feeling so sleepy. wonder why.feeling depressed too... my life is reallie going down-hill. which is not a pleasant feeling.. haha... and im feeling that urge to just crawl into my dreams and never wake up again. its just this wish that never gets fufilled. hah. maybe thats just the way things are.... to remind me to stop dreaming and come back to earth... but i will never stop dreaming. its just impossible to. i dun want to. haha... lately i've reallie been depressed... cried over nothing... like when i studied for the bio test, i didnt understand the stuff then i started crying. and seeing i rarely cry over anything at all.... oh well. thats that for today... mainly depressed reflections...

Image by FlamingText.com

2003-04-14T07:11:00.000-07:00

gosh... wanted to call mushroom just now. then i dialed the wrong number and some restaurant picked up. then they said "__ (couldnt catch the name) restaurant, may we help u?" and i was like, huh? then she asked if i wanted a take away but i was so stunned that i said no and hung up on her. ok. anw... i seriously need help on my life sceinces essay. its due tml. and emm's copy... argh heck. i'll just change around and copy and paste from the internet. heck.ARGH.
actually, i dun mind school. its just the work that i mind. everyone says they hate homework. but not as much as i do. i mean, they hate homework, but they still make an effort to do it rite? i hate homework and i reallie dun do well at it. i bet i have tons of homework not handed in. but theres no point reallie. the teachers will probably think im just some rebel kid that purposely doesnt want to do homework. and i hate maths too. damn it. i flunked the common test.
hell. i hate life. i wish life could just exist of storybooks and tv. but unfortunately, they dont. and i think im reallie going to flunk every subject this year. hell. bloody hell.

2003-04-09T00:46:00.000-07:00

The Fellowship of the Ring

Which Lord of the Rings Book Should You Read?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-04-09T00:28:00.000-07:00

haha.. so my monkey sucks. nvm. maybe i shud change its name. but "toffee-eating" sounds fine with me. just not agressive enuff. i think quizilla is reallie funny... but it can be kind of fun.. if ur bored. tho it reallie takes a long time to load... hah.

2003-04-07T22:46:00.000-07:00

wow. whats this all about?

2003-04-07T22:20:00.000-07:00

gah...hate my lack of self discipline... still have lots of homework left.. argh. argh... wails... and that stupid rgs web server quit on me!!! i carn access it. how can this be happening!!!! argh... why?!?!
sigh. just watched this reallie cool show called lizzie mcguire... on disney channel. ok ok.. i noe im a bit old to be watching disney channel but yarh.. i do. =P. haish... guess im just some immature being. >_< haha... apart from that, im also a couch potato and i like to watch tv alot... yeps... i sound like a lazy slob. eww. nvm. guess i am? ='(

2003-04-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

watched a horror film by leslie cheung. it was reallie freaky...
haish.. somehow, after watching all those shows to commemorate him, im still pretty shocked. he doesnt reallie look like the type who commits suicide... and acutally daring to take that step off the building... i think he must have had a really bad impact on his life... its pretty sad, reallie.. i guess sometimes the life of a superstar isnt all that they claim to be... fame and glamour.. but sometimes theres this empty feeling in ur life... and theres the worry of ppl being ur friend just because of ur fame. kind of reminds me of that song "lucky" by britney... haha... shall end off.

2003-04-06T01:36:00.000-08:00

dreams... why do they go when the night ends? to me, they feel as though they were just fantasies never to be lived... sometimes i wish i could just go to sleep for eternity and never wake up at all... and never leave my dreams... just live the life that i dream. i dont fit in here do i?i wish... that some day i would wake up somewhere else. some place where i dreamed of. another era.. another dimension... but reality is such that wishes are just folly and dreams are just lies and everyday, i am reminded that i have to stop dreaming someday and find my way back to where i am. but i can never do so. everyday, i continue dreaming away, even though i know that when i wake, nothing i dreamed of will be there and i will be pushed back to where i am. why did i have to live the life i am living? why cant i dream on for ever and ever?

2003-04-04T20:50:00.000-08:00

What month should you have been born in?

this quiz was made by Erin

Which Disney Princess Are You?

this quiz was made by Erin

Which dog breed are you?

this quiz was made by Erin

Are you British?

this quiz was made by Erin

Which Plant Are You?

this quiz was made by Erin

2003-04-04T20:04:00.000-08:00

school closure extended.... sigh sigh..... =(
sobs. why??? the chip in my reed just got bigger...... i need a new one desperately... how am i going to get a new one if the closure thing is extended? =(

2003-04-02T19:48:00.000-08:00

hmmm... eyeball's new blog layout is nice. i think the girl looks very final-fantasy-ish. anw... the last of my reeds chipped 3 days ago so i have no more good reeds left... and my mum definitely won't let me go out to buy...cuz of SARS... at least the chipped reed doesnt affect the tone that much... im just hoping the chip doesnt increase...
anw, i haf just realised that jillian (or gillian?) woon talks like that disney character from beauty and the beast, cogsworth... they pronounce their "why"s as "huai". its rather funny.. every history lesson she goes, "huai do u think Raffles did this? huai did Faquhar do that?" heh.

2003-03-26T03:49:00.000-08:00

WTF. school closed till 6th april... then comp how? Dawn says its most likely postponed... so ... dunno how larh. FREAK.

2003-03-25T19:15:00.000-08:00

hmm.. missed the first aid course again... had more rituals and stuff... [yikes, just wasted 45 bucks]... O_o"

yar.anw, just some verses i thought sounded nice... enjoy.

[From darkness I understand the night:
dreams flow, a star shines
Ah! I desire Evenstar

Look! A star rises out of the darkness
The song of the star enchants my heart
Ah! I desire...] -Anirion-

::In Dreams::

When the cold of Winter comes
Starless night will cover day
In the veiling of the sun
We will walk in bitter rain
But in dreams
I still hear your name
And in dreams
We will meet again

When the seas and mountains fall
And we come, to end of days
In the dark I hear a call
Calling me there
I will go there
And back again

The Fellowship of the Ring 2001

shall stop talking abt lotr... anw, sort of got over my grandfather's death already.. just that i think the house still feels so lonely.. When he was alive, he always busied himself arnd the house, making us traditional food, reading newspaper, watching tv and stuff... now its like, theres this dreadful silence. and you can still hear his voice call out, as though hes still there... haha... my grandfather was truly a wonderful person and watching him go, was definitely not a pleasant thing. but as they say, what must come will eventually come.. and him living up to 87 yrs of age was probably a long enough time, i guess...

2003-03-25T04:57:00.000-08:00

haha... today was pretty depressing... couldnt play G up to speed... my tongue just refused to work... i need to work on that area..
anw, i think authors are so cool. They just twist words into beautiful phrases and sad inspiritional sentences... Its like, u can reallie relate to what they are writing. Like Tolkien for example, all those poems he came up with are soo soo cool... like the part when he said, "for into the darkness fell his star, In Modor where the shadows are" and "the countelss stars of heaven's fields were mirrored in his silver shield"... you can really tell how sad the fate of the character is... and imagine inventing a whole new language.. thats like, totally wow. Well actually Tolkien invented 2, if u count Sindarion and Quenya separately... but back to the point, its so wonderful that he could create a new language based on knowledge of another (finnish).. And the plot itself.. its like this intricate web of people all spun into this huge adventure.. its a wonder where authors get their ideas from sometimes...haha... i think reading was, and still is, one of my favourite hobbies...
oh yar, thanks to eyeballs,sophia and hamsie for the nice shout outs... it was reallie appreciated. thanx a million.. =)

2003-03-24T04:37:00.000-08:00

sometimes i reallie hate growing up. Well, yeah, u get more mature, more civillised, less childish and more knowlegeable and stuff... but thats it. Growing up gives you more pressures and responsibilities, namely, school and homework. Sometimes i pass by some little babies, playing innocently... Watching them laugh, without any worries at all... i wish i were that age again. No school, i think the biggest worry u had on your mind was probably losing a toy. Everything else was taken care of efficiently by your parents... When i was young, everything seemed so fun and enjoyable. Now, all that has changed. Last time i used to enjoy CNY but now, its just another day with lots of dreaded hw piled up... where visitors come and expect you to go flash them a beeeg smile and say auspiscious stuff to them. As i grew older, i also became aware of so many problems around me.. minor ones like not finishing homework, scoring low for tests, ... and major ones like world peace, destruction of the earth, pollution and all that. Its so scaree sometimes i wish i could just drop dead. and of course... theres that expectation people have on you and that passion which you dont want to lose like ppl alwaes expecting me to do as well as my sister and stuff... and as for syf...its like... suddenly i become aware of how sucky i am. how gold is a far away dream... how afraid i am that i will be the factor to pull down the standards... and its so freaky... during mutual sharing it was like, i was biting back on tears because i was scared. Scared that i would not live up to expectations of past snrs, the public, the other bands, my directs, myself... I was so freaked out. but i couldnt say it. i wanted to escape from my fear. Yet i realise at the end of each day, that there is no way i can escape from all this. The longer i escape from it, the harder it slams into me at the end of everything. then, it'll just be worse... so in the end, im just left alone. what is the point in all this screaming? no one's listening anyway. my voice is just one out of thoe millions that u haf heard today... just another small, fading voice...it'll probably not be any difference.. at the end of the day, im just standing here. alone. and the rain falls on me hard and cold.

2003-03-23T07:26:00.000-08:00

They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told to you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown
And your mother loves your father
'Cause she's got nowhere to go And she wonders where these dreams go
'Cause the world got in her way
What's the point in ever trying
Nothing's changing anyway They press their lips against you
And you love the lies they say
And I tried so hard to reach you
But you're falling anyway And you know I see right through you
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screamin'
You're not listening anyway

aredhel

2003-03-22T02:25:00.000-08:00

my grandpa passed away while i was at band camp (last day)... yar so when i reached home, i was like, pushed around and whithin 5 minutes i was in mourning clothes and i had to sit through rituals and stuff... and it was like, my mind still hadnt fully registered what had happened. Then seeing my grandpa in a coffin... seeing everyone crying... knowing i was crying myself... the feeling was horrible. it was like all sad memories came rushing back to me... i could still remember the grip he had on my hand when i told him i was leaving for camp... and then he just said, "look after yourself.. remember to call home.." then he asked how long the camp was so i said 2 days then he sighed and said, "too late.. too long a wait..".. i didnt pay any attn to him cuz i took it for granted i would still be able to see him when i got back. I still remember the day after his operation... he was so happy and smiling and he said that he would be strong and healthy again. None of us could bear to tell him that the operation was only to check how big the tumour was, not to remove it. No one could bear to spoil his mood so we didnt tell him that the doctors couldnt do anything. Still, he figured out eventually... and now, he lies there in a coffin... he looks as though he were only sleeping... but the cold feel of his skin, the pale powder they put on him... on monday he will be cremated... i just wish that the image of his figure will not fade from my memory.. just as my grandmother's has. once a person is cremated, all that is left is a fine white dust. a body reduced to nothing but ash. i cant bear the idea but life has to be cruel in one way or another..

2003-03-18T05:03:00.000-08:00

sigh... tone still like shit... running notes still like shit. everything still like dunno wad. Gold is such a far away dream... felt so bad at NYP... squeaked 3 times. i dun like eyeball's reeds. so thin. i like the school's more. so suay. chipped it just b4 playing on stage. then had to borrow eyeball's. yech.
anw, just learnt how to season a reed. b4, i would just play with it until i could play. sigh. i am such a loser... blearh.. and i still haf the nike squirt bottle... haha.. wonder when i will actually give it to mushroom... hopefully not too long from now? :P... oh well, band camp tmr... yay... im just freaked by the idea of section/indiv testing... hah.. everytime i play G, i start tongue-ing but end up slurring. and the runup b4 B, everytime i practisce myself, most of the time can but infront of Xinyi, i freak then everything wrong. like today. even the tempo was wrong lor... so horrible kayz... then J... squeak squeak squeak... get the idea? haiz...

2003-03-11T06:41:00.000-08:00

deleted the stupid quiz cuz the pic steals all the attn from my cat! stupid pic. why so big? grrr... hah. anyway, dead poet's society is nice. yar. shall end.

2003-03-10T06:24:00.000-08:00

oh man. that stupid camera handling workshop is so bo liao. 15 mins just to learn that a camera can zoom in and out and move from left to right. wah lao. go get a life man. as if i didnt noe a camera could do that.
haiz. part indiv. quite gd. managed to even out a run-up. yay. but i still carn tongue anything lightly... Haiz.... the mood was quite lighthearted and quite fun larh.. but i felt too awkward to do anything. felt so maluated by my terrible playing... oh well.. if u dun succeed at first, try, try and try again. forgot to wear my specs today. haha... cuz emmalines dad came super early today then i woke up late. so i was in a rush and forgot to take my specs. heh. so pai seh...

2003-03-09T07:55:00.000-08:00

haiyar... i still carn tongue 8th bar of i lightly. how? it jsut comes out too harsh. same for G and 4 bars b4 D. haiyar...
yah so anyway, went for cassy's play with mushroomie yesterday after band prac. went to fareast first to buy cass a prezzie and ate this fried japanese thing for dinner. yah then we got off 1 bus stop too early. had to walk in the rain. got a bit of minor flu today... heh.oh yar. tml still got dat supid camera workshop. and maths common test on wed. bao(1) ding(4) fail. Heck.

2003-03-04T18:48:00.000-08:00

comp studies now... yah.. must reallie thank mingyan for explaining the factorisation crap just now... but then, i still suck at it. i got the sbj again. its so farnie... kinda forgot what it was like writing in it... heh. ok im nuts. poor jas and soph. they are so gonna kill me. cuz i alwaes hog it. =P. sho sho sleepy. fell aslp while watching "student bodies" on disney channel last night. it was farnie but some parts were veh boring so i just fell aslp. yah. oh well... im veh the bo liao now. also realised that mushroom eats fast, like eyeballs. they shud haf a competition one day.. ok ok. im starting to crap. shall just preceed to stone in front of the comp. and cheryl, ur gossip is reallie scandalous.. imagine all that mushiness. *puke*. haha. i like charissa's blog. the fire and ice thingie... so cool.. the blu goes well wif the black so perfectly. just came to noe abt jeanette's blog while visiting mushroom's. haha, mushroom FINALLY got links in her blogs. nvm. i dun think anyone noes wad im toking abt.

2003-03-04T05:57:00.000-08:00

guess wad? tried out this and got a different result. wierd

You are an Elementalist. Your magic stems from the
forces of nature. You might be a forest
nuturing Druid, a storm-creating Weather-Wizard
or any of the many Elementals, but one thing is
sure-- your bond with nature is strong. You can
rely heavily on nature to support yourself
aesthetically or physically for it lends you
both comfort and strength. Your instincts
rarely fail you. You are vibrantly passionate
but are sometimes carried away by your own
emotions.

Which Magical Order Are You In?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-03-04T05:26:00.000-08:00

oh hi everybaaaardy. guess wad? today we had to sing some wierd songs for dunno wad reason and one of them had a lot of the words "somebody" in it so it was pretty funny. mushroom, sze min and i kept stressing on the somebarrdy part.. =)
went home today and discovered i haf a few more birthday presents i never gave to ppl. e.g the nike squirt bottle for mushroom, "the dog" cushion for jeanette, some softtoy keychain and dunno wad else for ppl i dun even remember hu its for... this is so wonderful. wasting money on expensive presents which i DUN give out. wow.

2003-03-01T22:16:00.000-08:00

haiz... couldnt go to the geog thing on sunday again... am researching on tampines mall currently but i dun seem to b getting anything of much use.. hmm... sleepy. dun feel like going to school tml. but thats not unusual. ha... got influenced by my mortal to read lotr stuff... the hobbit is actually quite nice. =). the fellowship of the ring... just started.. think that tolkien is so cool... all those phrases and stuff.. yah anyway, today i seem to be getting into reallie bad situations. firstly, i get scratched by either the racket or shuttlecock and there is now this gash on my leg. goodness noes how i managed to ram the shuttlecock against my leg. i think im nuts. and then later on, i almost get knocked down by 10 cars at this reallie big junction. SO scary k... the traffic light showed the green man sign but suddenly there was this whole fleet of cars honking at me. then i started to panic and ran to the other side lor. (i was in the middle of the road. scary... and then i take the wrong bus so i end up having to walk back to the same scary junction. and later on, i finally reach my tuition centre, i almost get knocked down by a van. gosh. i am sooo having a phobia on crossing roads. i dun dare to cross roads ever again.

You are a Spiritualist. Your magic flows from the
primal forces of the cosmos. You could be a
gentle Healer, a miraculous Prophet or a
spirit-summoning War-mage with the strong link
your soul provides to the realms beyond
reality. You have preternatural abilities,
intutively sensing the personality of people
you meet and discerning events yet to happen.
You enhance your aura with meditative pursuits.
You are a good judge of character but your
idealism or morality can confuse others.

Which Magical Order Are You In?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-24T04:43:00.000-08:00

ARGH... woke up with bloodshot eyes today... gawsh... and emmaline's dad's van was so darn freakin cold. and i didnt bring my jacket OR sweatshirt... so stupid. think i could haf froze to death.. hah. just changed to size 3 reed. so depressing man... i couldnt blow anything properly with it... =( yah and my high notes were so so airy and hard to reach man... so depressing. then the sec 3s (clarinets) kept staring at me when they walked by... ARGH. i think they think my tone is lan and i noe that my tone IS lan. haiz. what to do? and theres the stupid freaking tong yi ce yan tml. ARGH. then my brain was not functioning properly thruout tuition. i think it got affected by the brain freeze. and i am SHO sleepy lor... and wednessday still haf that jap CA1 thing.. FREAK. i am SO going to die. AAAARGH.... Today is SUCH a WONDERFUL day man... failed both the kao cha too. so nice rite? probably failed the maths test too. forget it. im just going to give up mugging like i gave up on maths today. some times, i wish i could just give up on everything i knew. just go to slp and wake up without remembering anything i ever did. ok nvm. i going more and more nuts. and guess wad? i carn serve a blardy shuttlecock without de-feathering it.

2003-02-23T06:26:00.000-08:00

yesterdae was take off... =). in the morning had sectionals which was quite fun larh... i was more relaxed than usual.. then emmaline got gastrics cuz she didnt eat breakfirst. tsk. so scary.. and dawn had a coughing fit thing so xin yi kept asking dawn and emm if the 2 of them were feeling ok.. yah then we had section lunch with saxes and cats. then jas(g) and i had no money lor... and grace so nice, lent us 12 bucks... heh.. thanks. ended up eating spicy chicken (the one at macs)... felt so stuffed after dat. then walked back to school which was quite gd... yah so after dat we went to sit in the amphi while waiting for afternoon prac to start. but after a while, it got reallie hot so we all went to sit in the void deck place. had no water and pink dolphin was sold out so i went to buy 100 plus... then yeng ling said that it might attract ants to the reed. bleh. and my reed got chipped... but everyone was soo sooo happy.. even mr oura. i kept smiling after dat=)...
yah... i think we hurt her feelings... all my fault. shudnt haf just listened to my sis and followed stupidly to every thing. =( ... yah... i reallie liked the present from the sec 3s. the airplane is reallie cute... and the lollipop was reallie nice and the notes too... and our bandana was white with diff color patterns. then emm and i took the one with black ones cuz they looked the nicest. so mean rite...
then the concert... ok lah... my playing... but i squeaked once during mbc and once during drm... the mc speech was funny... and then eyeballs jumped when the bass drum and cymbals sounded... then charlotte and clara started laughing... heh... quite fun larh on the whole... =)

2003-02-20T05:34:00.000-08:00

heh... today we had band prac in the amphi-theatre again... then emmaline, sze min, me, gek and jas g had free block so we went to set up chairs and perc instruments.. yah.. just realised that emmaline's method of pushing a trolley(for moving stacks of chairs) is very animated and noisy... O_o".. yah so anyway we moved this whole stack of chairs to the top of the amphi and then we fwerent sure how many chairs were supposed to be in the second row. so we asked Charlotte, who happened to be walking by. Then she started counting and saying out all the names. Then i got reallie confused.. cuz she repeated Grace and Cheryl 3 or 4 times. Yah.. then after dat, Han Xin, sze min and i started climbing onto the top of the stack of chairs and then we started to be spasticated and say that we conquered the chairs... ok nvm. hmm.. then charlotte came over to ask me to look after her flute. dun think she thought i was trustworthy.. cuz she repeatedly told me not to drop/lose her instru. yah and i was veh worried that if a direct came by, she would scold me for touching a flute.senior's flute some more... so in the end, i placed it on a bench. Then, it started raining. then... PANIC. there was this frenzy and we started to move all the perc instrus into the shade. then, less than 5 minutes later, the rain STOPPED. Yah then later on in band prac, while mr oura was conducting, it started raining too. and there was a mad frenzy of keeping instruments,stands,scores and chairs into the shade. then, less than 1 minute later, it stopped raining again. haiz... i was sooooo pissed k. 2nd time the rain came and went so fast.. yah then sze min dropped this perc instru and the string thingie snapped.. we were soooo scared lor.. panic like siao. thanx to the stupid rain.. yah then after b.prac, we started to keep stuff and i was carrying the conductor's stand back to the band room and the thing swung right infront of me when i was going up the stairs. and then i couldnt see where i was going and i tripped over the stairs.. then i was scared i wud drop the conductor scores so my hand instantly came up to catch the stand. then there was this crack sound and my wrist started hurting.. think i twisted it or something. [currently having this wierd ice pack around it. feels very din4 dei3. bleh. oh well tmr have bl prac. =) skipping 3rd lang =D.. yah.. then yengling wanted to tell me how to improve my playing for the concert so she told me in this very serious voice, "i have something very important to tell you." yah then i was damn freaked out lor... then i was TRYING to tell emmaline what yengling told me. but she kept going "aah" so i started having laughing fits and i kept forgetting what to tell her and when i finally remember, i remember that i told her that alredi. sigh. so shi(1) bai(4)... =P

2003-02-17T04:39:00.000-08:00

yay! my grandpa is getting discharged tml... but the doctors still think they carn do much abt the tumour in his stomach.. bleh.. shall have positive thoughts.must not be pessimistic.
mc to skip PE ended, so i had to run 3 whole rounds today. but somehow, emmaline's method really worked. whenever i reallie felt like walking and not running anymore, all i had to do was think of g and i would instantly feel the strength to continue running. the running notes just kept going thru my mind..
haha.. had life sciences and i practically forgot everything frm last year... =P so i couldnt answer a single thing. oh btw, ivan soh crumpled my w/s. the 2nd worksheet he destroyed. as in he was trying to tell us what was wrong with our graphs, so i was standing right in front of him (most unfortunately), and suddenly, he just snatched my w/s and started folding it until only my curve could be seen. then he asked, "does the curve take up more than 1/2 the paper?" then he unfolded it most uncarefully and said to me, "that wasnt deliberate. it was just to show you that ur curve was too small." WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM?! as in he could have snatched anyone else's but he didnt. i think its his revenge for me not being polite in his class. ugh.
oh well... bought prezzies for take off.. met cheryl seah along the way and she bought me this cat keychain.. *thanks a million!!!* so i bought her a squirrel one. heh.. shall buy u a real nice prezzie for ur burfday k? =) speaking of b'daes, i still have birthday presents for 2 ppl =) who shud noe who they are rite =)
yah.. bet im gonna fail geog test as well. and history test tml too. haiz........

2003-02-16T05:10:00.000-08:00

i think that the goo goo dolls are so cool.. their songs (lyrics) can just hit you right in your face with reality..as in, the song really really fits.e.g the song "its over", it really fits into this situation in my life.gosh.how do they do that? and sometimes the truth hurts.. yah... was listening to this song and i really really thought that it was pretty true in a way and sad. but then, im stubborn and hard-headed so i dun think i wud take my stand...and the fact that im always trying to escape from reality makes it harder. i guess its more of pride perhaps.. dunno. my sis think i changed alot from last yr... i think generally, i was a nicer person last year. this year, im like, getting pissed really easily and i made 3 enemies in 1 month. *blinks*. need an attitude adjustment... well, enjoy the lyrics..

And I didn't think about
All the ways I hurt you and myself
And I hide
Wouldn't say a thing to you
I keep it to myself
In my mind
I can't stand without you
I won't find the answers
When you're gone

But it's over to you
I can't find the answers when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can't find the answer where you are

And you know... (and you know)
I need you now
And this ain't easy to admit
And no one needs to know
What goes on behind
The door in my room
I'm kicking through the
Walls in my mind

I can't stand without you
I won't find the answers
When you're gone
But it's over to you
I can't find the answers when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can't find the answers where you are

I won't tear you down
I won't tear you down
To get into the world you wanted
I'm kicking through the walls
No one can believe
In things that never change

But it's over to you
I can't find the answers when you're gone
And it's over to you
You can't find the answers where you are

And it's over to you
I can't find the answers when you're gone
I can't find the answers when you're gone
I can't find the answers when you're gone

and here are more lyrics which seem to contradict the earlier song but i couldnt help but feel that they were true too...
Reanimation].

When I look into your eyes
There's nothing there to see
Nothing but my own mistakes
Staring back at me

Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta time,
left to watch it all unwind
Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down
Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta time,
left to watch it all unwind
Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down

I've lied
To you
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you
(Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down)
(Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta
time, left to watch it all unwind)
For sake of being with you
(Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down)
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I stay when you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me

I've tried
Like you
To do everything you wanted to
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you
(Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down)
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
(Everything has to end, you'll soon find, we're outta
time, left to watch it all unwind)
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I stay when you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me

Reverse psychology's failing miserably
It's so hard to be, left all alone
Telling you is the only chance for me
Theres nothing left but, to turn and face you
When I look into your eyes, there's nothing there to see
Nothing but my own mistakes staring back at me
Asking why...
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie (why)
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I stay when you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me
Why I stay when you
Just push away
No matter what you see
You're still so blind to me

2003-02-15T23:47:00.000-08:00

yay... shall officially thank sze min for helping me do the blog layout. its sho kewt and sweet.. then the linking looks abit like sophia's.. at the bottom that kind of thing. ^_^ haha.. i think im seriously getting influenced by sze min. cuz she alwaes sprouts out funny comments like when she plays badminton, she will suddenly say something like, i want to eat carrot cake. then she will give this very thoughtful look. then dat day in the 3rd lang bus, i suddenly said "i want to eat a sausage" out of the blue. then emmaline gave me this wierd look which made me burst out in a laughing fit. =D... then during art, emmaline drew this portrait of leonardo da vinci. then sze min *dolly* started making wierd strokes all over his hair and made his hair look longer. then during jap class, we were supposed to draw in the features of this picture of a girl with no face, and i started making wierd strokes on her hair to make her hair look longer. then emmaline burst out in a laughing fit,and yuri and i started laughing too.. getting a lot of laughing fits nowadays.. i think its gd in a way, cuz whenever i get these long laughing fits, its sort of an escape from reality and it makes me feel very carefree.
yah. here are just some personality tests.. havent done alot for a long time...

Which Disney Princess are You?Find out!

Are You Crazy??Find out!
AWWW... i wanted to be insane... =(

Which Music Type are You?Find out!

Which Part of a Meal Are You?Find out!

2003-02-15T02:05:00.000-08:00

well, since she told me to fuck off, i think its better this way, since we were never real best friends anyway.. *shrugs*. farnie, i dun seem to feel pissed or sad or upset about the end of this friendship. my mind is just this total blank. yah but i do haf one thing to say.. just because constance thinks im some fucker or bitch or wadever she thinks, i dun think its fair to critiscize all the geppers. I mean, im not a very model kind of person. if u want a nice gepper, look at jing wei instead...
oh well, the friendship is over, and i dun think i'll bother to patch it up. carn b bothered to lar. i mean, i dun think i reallie thought of her as a best friend since i dun feel anything about ending our frinedship, and i dun think she ever thought of me as a best friend at all since she is so ready to severe all ties with me. *shrugs again*

2003-02-15T01:55:00.000-08:00

Argh... my comp hung just after i had updated the entry and i haf to re-type everything now...
yah.. today we had a technical rehearsal and it was quite okay... budden halfway thru, the sun came out and it was quite glaring. yah.. and hui chong told us not to expose the instruments into the sun so we had to position our clarinets very wierdly. the after a while, the sun got hidden by clouds or something so we placed our clarinets back into the usual position but less than a minute later, the sun came out again. then it kept happening.. quite irritating. but now when i look at it from a different point of view, it seemed rather comical in a way...
yah.. packed concert files today liaoz... ^_^ then for some unknown reason, i got reallie hungry and soph,eyeballs and i went for lunch. it was reallie nice and sophia and eyeballs reallie helped me to not be so pissed with certain ppl...thankew... i was describing the situation then sophia said this reallie fair statement that was true in a way abt how maybe she was running away from the truth.. and eyeballs told us this reallie funnie story abt this pipsqueak of a guy in her theory class.. hah.
yahz.. like jas g said in her blog, im becoming more attatched to the band corr.. yah... and ur welcome too jas g.. haha.. beat ur high-score ^_^

2003-02-13T05:55:00.000-08:00

Prongs

Harry Potter - Which Marauder Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-13T04:46:00.000-08:00

yay yay yay.. band prac.. could play DRM quite okay-ly. except the piu mosso part. its like wad? the whole thing running notes? and SOOO fast... aiyarz... need to do more indiv on that part i guess... hmm.. we played the sch song too.. yay. its sounds quite kewl oh yar.. sze min, the website for my template is this: http://www.halfwaygully.com/snazz/layouts/blogs/html/006/006.htm
yah.. it looks much better than this woman. must help me change ah? otherwise i kill u.
and for this certain person, stop buggin me when i tell u to stop. or else i will suspect that ur deaf, or u simply just have no ability to understand english. and yes, the entry was refering to you, as well as 2 ppl. and no, i dun forgive that easily. and im dao-ing the 2 ppl too. if im not worth the mud off his majesty's feet, then i dun see the point of continuing to tok to his and her majesties.

Sorry hor to the rest of u if u dun understand wad im toking about. just damn pissed lorz..
oh yar.. sorry hor cheryl, last minute couldnt go out with u.. at least u got urself a similar sweatshirt to mine and sze min. can freak ivan soh out even more.. he thought we were some evil griffin thingie issit?

2003-02-12T06:38:00.000-08:00

i am SO damn pissed with 2 ppl. Just cuz u like a guy more than u like me, it does NOT mean u can critiscize me publicly on HIS webpage/blog. and for the other one, if u really treat me as a friend, then SHOW it to me. I dun think u are being much of a friend when u blame me for not being able to turn up for ur birthday. U made me feel so guilty cuz u went on and on and on about how u would cry.. When u say things like that, im the one who feels bad. NOT u. why? cuz u go on and on about my flaws and how im not being a gd friend. and also, i DID tell u to follow ur heart, but that doesnt mean that u can go on critiscizing my passion on UR blog. Whatever. maybe i dun care. its ur blog after all. I dun even noe u anymore. if u stilll treat me as a friend, show me respect for the things i do, pls. and when i tok to my batchmates/classmates, its only natural. dun expect me to be tied down to u. u only.

2003-02-10T06:08:00.000-08:00

had to go for maths tuition today... wah laoz... cut off my indiv time.. this is bad. this is bad. still owe hrs... haiz.. dun wurrie szemin, i think being crappie is fun in a way. ^_^
yah.. i think having a whole gang of ppl wearing back sweatshirts would be cool... haha.. think ivan soh wud be freaked out... speaking of which, will he eat oranges again tml? *ugh*...
haiz.. eliza, must be optimistic k... who says u dun matter to this wurld? must CHEER UP!!!
yah... have to update links i think... bleargh... too lazy lehz...
yah this is a reallie reallie short entry and im signing off now.

2003-02-08T20:27:00.000-08:00

Saturday(yesterday) was quite fun... in the morning our section batch sort of did indiv together... sounded quite nice... but some parts were rather umm... uneven. Then we had the maintenance (wrong sp?) instrument workshop thingie by David Wong... It was quite ok.. then he asked us about what cleaning stuff we had.. and Emmaline was the only one who had a mouthpiece brush. So he asked her where she bought it and she sort of stuttered "at the*pause* band *pause* world." then david wong repeated it with all the pauses.. yah.. that was quite funny.
then during lunch, Sze min, jas guo went to da pao chicken rice for eliza and wan xian back with me.. and we were discussing how the boneless chicken rice was not really boneless after all. yah. crappy~ ^_^ ... and then i finally bought my sweatshirt. yay. jas and sze min helped me choose it... and then after lunch, sze min tied my 2 ponytails into 1 cuz she thought it went better with the sweatshirt.. farnie.. yah then after dat, sze min and i went to the sec 1 corridor to practice.. my tone was veh airy.. sighz..
yah.. sze min and i swapped hp covers... so now my handphone looks like hers.. aiyo.. i think im getting crappier and crappier.. shall just sign off. ^_^

2003-02-06T05:57:00.000-08:00

argh... today was such a bad bad day...
But Science was quite "interesting"... =P First of all, Ivan Soh clambered onto the teachers table on fours, pretending to be a four-legged creature. And then he started going on about which parts of the body were dorsal and ventral and wadever... then when he came to the part on prosterior, he gave this "whacko" grin and whacked his butt. Sick lar. Oh yar.. then he purposely found a "valid" excuse to eat a mandarin orange in class. To help us understand the concepts of digestion. Sigh...
Then all the sec 2 GEP had to skip band prac and go for this art museum trip thingie. which was utterly pointless. i dun think i learnt anything at all after the trip.. other than the fact that sponge-block-towers are fun to knock over...? and that Ivan Soh thinks wolves are coyotes. Yah.. then after dat, Eliza and I went home together... and we got hopelessly lost.We walked like, dunno how far just to find a bus-stop that 75 goes to. Sigh.. and stupid mushroom was giving us stupid directions... goodness.. And then when we finally found the bus-stop, we missed the bus and had to wait for 20 more minutes for the next one to come. Yah.. and there was this freaky jap guy (also at the bus-stop) who looks like my sister's bf, and he kept staring at my school badge.. wonder wads his problem.
Yah.. by the time i reached home it was like, 8 pm alredi... then summore had to climb up the hill... then i was sooo sooo tired and hungry. And i couldnt reallie understand the jap homework... feel so sad.. its like, last year I reallie loved jap and put so much effort into it, and this yr its like, i heck-care heck-care liddat... then every lesson also late.. haiz... feel guilty.
Sigh... i dunno why lah.. but seriously, all the teachers definitely DUN like our class.. and Jillian woon doesnt bother to hide that.. Today i think they gu(4) yi(4) made us wait outside the art museum for sooo long before they let us in. haiz...
haiyar.. today damn depressing lah.. and im not in a forgiving mood.. so hamsie, nope. too bad.

2003-02-04T18:27:00.000-08:00

heh... feeling so sleepy... comp studies now... am slacking again.
this morning, cheryl and i unplugged mr Soh's "surround sound system" again... but he found out. am planning to unplug the circuit board next time...
still dun understand indices much sia... veh confused.. haiz...
oh yar.. today the comp studies teacher was so grouchy.. just because sarah didnt walk up to her when answering her qn, she says we dun have any manners. i mean like, whats her problem?
sigh..emmaline is going to do indiv after 3rd lang. i want to go too... shall have to persuade my mum to let me.. bleh. am veh broke... and i owe emmaline money... heck... shall starve for the next few days lar... k lar... sign off now.

2003-02-04T05:26:00.000-08:00

sigh sigh... cny hols are over... bleah.so sad man... had to come back to school... oh yarh... finally gave hui chong her birthday present.. haiz... sooo sooo belated sia...
heh. me thinks i produce too much saliva... my clarinet kept getting stuck due to too much saliva in the barrel and mouthpiece today. so abnormal... and my cloth is so disgustingly dirty... shall have to wash it. sigh.. and my reed looks like its turning mouldy... 3rd one this YEAR. can u believe it? less than 2 months and 3 mouldy reeds already.. and i wash the reeds in water k... as in rinse properly. sigh... shall not make further comments..
shall have to practisce harder for take off... the date is getting closer and closer... so scary man... im getting really freaked... and like pei xuan says, must put in 110% and ur whole heart and soul into the remaining band pracs. yar.
Emmaline's instru is still veh the stuck... dunno how she survives liddat... so hard to pull out.. or push in for that matter... cuz today she sounded a bit flat.. then try to push in.. budden no matter how hard still cannot push in.. then dunno wad to do.. sigh.
yarh.. alwaes forget to bring the forbbiden love scores for sze min.. hope i remember tml... ah.. havent jap homework.. if there was any.. *pai seh*..

2003-02-01T01:58:00.000-08:00

yay. just updated some of the links... deleted one, which belonged to a *toot*. added cheryl seah's. its reallie cool... i like the template... and cheryl, if ur reading this, i just watched the lord of the rings first movie.. seems kewl.. wanna start reading the book.. =P..also added woon jeck's. cuz he told me to.. wonder how he even got hold of my blog. must be cassandra... sighz..
im currently listening to El bimbo played by tokyo kosei wind orch. sounds reallie reallie nice... haha..still remember the sec 4s played it for teacher's day [i think] last year.. it was reallie nice.. bleh.. happie cny to one and all.

2003-01-28T06:21:00.000-08:00

What's your inner band instrument?

What Pattern Are You?

2003-01-28T06:16:00.000-08:00

sometimes even though we try and we try, its like how emmaline described that star in the sky which she couldnt reach... its like, i try and i try but sometimes i haf to admit that im still lan... i carn play run-ups properly, i carn sight-read... then there are times when i realli feel like giving up, but then, i think about how i haf alredy disapointed and let down the whole band.. esp the seniors lorh... even during inunion, the snrs also told me to put in more effort.. i dunno lar... this yr is SYF year... i reallie want rgssb to get gold and presentation... but sometimes i just feel like a total failure and that i probably pull down the band's standards.. like that time xinyi and liu rui were lecturing us outside the squash courts, they said that we shouldn't just rely on them to cover up for us.. i get the feeling that in reality, the snrs DO cover up for me, as in.. they play better and hide my lousy playing.. yar.. then theres this shout out that really left me feeling something that i carn put down in words.. but it seriously made me cry..
Well, indeed the seniors will always be there standing still waiting for us, but what if we were just failures and that we could never stand up on that path?Sometimes i search so hard for answers i carn even find myself..

from guotong's blog. on 25 january 2003. shoutout no. 3:
Sometimes trying too hard makes things worse. Anyhow, if all else fails, remember that your seniors will be there. Sometimes it seems like they're not there. Or that they don't care.
But they always will. Because they feel that they are responsible for you. And some may be stricter than others. Some may be fiercer than others. Some may have underlying white-hot anger. That's cause they feel responsible for you. And scared. That if they teach you something wrong, it will determine the rest of your life.
And some will not show it at all. Some believe that it's not good to show emotion.
But even if one day you totally disappoint your seniors. Or if you hurt them. Or anything at all. They won't leave and leave you alone. Because you're their juniors. Even if the world falls or despite everything that they feel like doing.
They'll wait for you. They might not turn around to dry your tears. But they'll be there standing still. And they know that as long as they stay on the right path, you'll come back to them.

Posted By: apathy 1/26/2003 5:04:32 AM

2003-01-27T18:37:00.000-08:00

gosh.. the whole incident about wanxian's blog is so so shocking... and its like, we dun write in our blogs for show or anything lor... its sad larh... how phrasing and words we write sometimes create such big misunderstandings.. and well... Its gd that the whole incident has come to a standstill... i hope. yarh...
anyway... bought hui chong a belated birthday prezzie yesterday.. just found out that her birthday is on the 11th january... so farnie... think we shud haf asked earlier.. yar.. anyway, so after we asked xinyi, emmaline and i went to far east plaza with the basses section batch, cuz they were buying iris a present. yarh.. then we were deciding whether to buy hc a teddy bear or a mashi maro.. then dunno hu said hui chong liked korean stuff cuz she watched winter sonata.. then we decided that mashi maro was korean so we bought that. farnie... oh well...
yar.. passed yengling her do re mi scores yesterday.. but didnt do indiv in the end..

2003-01-26T07:02:00.000-08:00

haha... slept alot yesterday... (after fds.) my flu is more or less gone. :P
shit larh.. i carn play do re mi / hr for h.wood well. and i got lost for silver crest twice. did larh. die larh.. how am i going to master these songs within such a short time? Oh im SO dead. argh.. and i haf NOT managed to sell any tickets at all. the first 4 ppl arent sure, my family *might* come, and this idiot prefers to go for a CO concert the day before, so that idiot is not buying tickets from me. WAH LAO.
humph. anyway.. friday no school.. blearghz..
oh yar.. emm called today to ask me how the jay chou cd looks like (the one wif long(2) juan(3) feng(1) and xing(1) qing(2).. YEAH... i like all of his songs.. all veh nice =)

2003-01-23T05:55:00.000-08:00

oh yar!!! now cannot da pao drinks to band corr alredi... cuz hor, that day i went to da pao fdrinks. then the auntie veh pissed with me. and she wanted to complain to the uncle. but he thot she wanted coins and slammed the whole box of coins too hard and she got a fright and dropped the packet of orange juice and had to fill another packet. and then she started cursing shit like dunno how many times. Then i was pretty freaked. Then hui Juen and cheryl seah moved away from the q started laughing like siao. then i started laughing. and the auntie gave me this death glare. so i pretended to be laughing at my watch. then she glared at me even more... then after dat, we went up to corr and i couldnt stop laughing.. haha.. still carn belief it..

2003-01-23T05:24:00.000-08:00

yay yay yay.. shall be deliriously happie... played backdraft again... =) i reallie wuv the song. its sooooo cool.
haha.. today my brain not functioning. i lifted my clarinet to play when 3rds had nothing to play at one part of a song. sigh... than i kept playing tuning C as C#. ARGH... carn believe it lorh...
lalala... still like backdraft alot... and i downloaded Tokyo Kosei wind orch's animation medley.. so NICE!!! listen to it can cry one lorhz.. so many emotions... suddenly it was like, i reallie missed life in 2002... sec one life... then i started remembering all those ancient stuff like band camp again... and then there was the drawing of fishes... and then we lost them.. haiz... then during band camp, sophia and i stayed up to tok abt wierd stuff... and our section batch was hanging by the monkey bars at night... argh... so nostelgic... its funny how a song can bring out so many memories suddenly...
humph.some ppl think im mean.. cuz i zhan(3) duan(4) my frenship btwn an old fren. but its like, its my own problem so, get of my back and just let me solve it my way! bleargh...

2003-01-22T03:41:00.000-08:00

haha.. back at home now, stuck with history assignment. haha.. 3rd lang was quite dreary today. kept sneezing and coughing and feeling like sleeping... oh yar... today ivan soh was in such a crazy mood. He scolded us the moment he came in and said that if he hadnt come in, we wud haf continued sitting down chatting while the pledge was going on. I mean, like, how stupid are we? we NOE when to stand up for the pledge and stuff liddat.ugh. then after dat he scolded Grace for not giving him a presentable file and that he wud book her if sh didnt give him a presentable file by today.. So siao.
yar... Cao cao rawks this wurld. we topped the clazz lorh.. =) 125 points. yeah man.. and then chinese teacher, mdm loy made the ppl wearing culottes today stand up and tuck their shirts all the way in, as in really in.eww... we looked so nerdy man...
then mdm rehana came today. I think I lost touch for comprehension and summary writing. had a hard time doing that compre today and summore its all those chim chim words kind of passage.
im getting more and more pissed with those sec 1s. today they ran after the 3rd lang bus. AGAIN. and then, when the last bus came, they started squealing. And they pushed past Sophia, who was in the front of the q, and rushed up the bus. I mean, its the last bus. HELLO?? you can definitely get a seat lorh... sigh. and this morning, this bunch of sec 1s saw me in the foyer and then they starte screaming, " AHHHH. its that crazy person who force us to join band! AHHH" then they ran away. I mean, like, HELLO? whats their problem?! YUCK.. i carn stand them
oh btw, Emm, i like ur template. Lilo and Stitch are shooooo kewt. and your shout out that isnt a shout out thing is cool. I like the black background. =) kk. gtg

2003-01-21T19:06:00.000-08:00

oh WTF. my shout outs thingie disapeared. ARGH.

2003-01-21T19:05:00.000-08:00

comp studies... slacking as usual.. flash is cool but i dun like computer stuff much... the color fading thing is so nice loh... haha... the fading effect also.. hmm.. bought cookies from nicole today.. yay. they are very nice. i like the choc chip one... but everyone ate them up b4 i could eat it.. =(
sigh.. wanted to do indiv today but haf 3rd lang... i still carn believe emm's clarinet was stuck so tightly.. haha.. thats amusing, she had to ask xinyi to help her separate them almost everyday... bleh.. wonder why hers is so tight.
yay. Im wearing sze min's black sweatshirt now.. i reallie like it. tho its so big that it comes down to just a few inches above the culottes.. looks veh pai. but its big and comfy. =) and its black and blue... so cool lorhz... i also wan one.
oh btw, i juz bought a silver polishing cloth... spent 1 hr polishing my keys yesterday... now its like, everytime i play abit, i start worrying abt whether i haf too many finger prints on the keys.. yar. stuff liddat. shou(4) bu(4) liao(3)... i like my clarinet...
oh wellz... i shall sign off now i guess...
p.s: note to an insensitive individual: frenship is not frenship if its strained, so you might as well give up.

2003-01-21T08:23:00.000-08:00

yay... downloded "backdraft" from kazaa.. i reallie like the song veh much.. it sounds very majestic and cool and yar... u get the idea. then sze min was telling me about how she went to universal studios and saw the making of backdraft or something liddat and there was real fire. SO cool. I want to watch the movie...
Haha.. I like sze min's sweatshirt. Its black and warm and loose... but a bit too big. haha. nvm nvm. then everyone kept taking turns to wear it and someone [carn remember hu.. sorrie] thought we all had the same sweatshirt. so farnie...
Argh... chipped my reed today during bandprac. then had to buy from accent.[a band shop]. bleargh. there goes my money. Im now veh broke... and i carn stand my stupid coff. I coffed thru out band prac. so pai seh. and i couldnt stop. that was the worse part. UGH. shall sign off now.. and i think my shout outs dun work...=S

2003-01-14T06:23:00.000-08:00

haha... got our new clarinets today... its reallie brand new.. sho happie.. =)
oh yar.. today we had had sec 2 sectionals... bleargh.. couldnt play well at all... esp the off beats. kept starting correct but slwing down and playing on beats instead... and then i couldnt sight read the new song... argh... nevermind... die. tml got kao cha... blearghz... shall haf to try study now... gtg!

2003-01-13T05:19:00.000-08:00

bleargh... i forgot to give shunling the excuse letter for leaving early for footdrills... anyhow... went to hopital to see my grandfather.. his cancer cells grew back somewhere in his bile duct or wadever u call it. sigh... i just feel reallie depressed about it.
anyhow.. today there was p.e... ran 5 rounds.. then sze min and emmaline were running reallie fast. ok, jogging. wadever. so i decided to follow their suite and then after the 5 rounds, i felt like dying.. my calf muscles hurt. then... had surprise maths quiz today.. graded one summore.. but it was nothing about maths. ok. nvm.
yar.. in the afternoon... xinyi took emm and me in the sec 1 corr.. eyeballs couldnt go.. her mum probably didnt allow her... =( oh well... then clarine was also there, doing her homework.. xinyi taught us how to play the running notes properly and she taught us methods to practisce them. hope i get them right. then after dat, my mum came to fetch me home and eliza wanted a lift home.. but sze min and wan xian ran off with her bag.. then it was veh funnie.. cuz they even ran out of the school.. haiz... then after i went home, started on geog homework. then szemin called and asked me to send her the harry potter english thingie.. and my printer broke down so sze min helped me print alot of stuff... thankew!!
ok... shall end off here.

2003-01-09T05:50:00.000-08:00

sigh. today is such a depressing day.. forgot to bring my jacket to school... almost froze to death in the klassroom... Then band prac was changed to sectionals. The newest song dat i noe of that is in the feb concert is hooray for hollywood. I could only play the first part. so sad. =( yar. den hui chong's scores [first page] was "lost", still in some file and noone knew where it was.but emmaline found it after sectionals. and then after dat band announcements... kenah scolding lor... cuz we not putting in enuff effort and stuff... feel so guilty.. and dere's intensive fd this saturday. i hope my fd is acceptable loh... otherwise reallie bad. and now my mum might want me to quit band... cuz of the footdrills this saturdae. it clashes with my tuition and i cancelled tuition. So now shez scolding me and saying stuff like, "you dont even play as well as your sister so why stay on?" or "why do you take up such a heavy cca when your sister alredi did?"
As in.. I dunno how to answer her lor.. maybe its true dat im just a failure and i carn even play the clarinet well.. ARGH. i realli dun noe wad to do..